Written By Justin Thomas Case
LAS VEGAS, NV - TULSA, OK -
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that AVAILABLE.COM is a valuable resource for buying and selling real estate and unsold media. After all, the word "AVAILABLE" already appears on thousands of vacant billboards and millions of commercial and residential properties all over the world - so why not on hookers? Talk about Social Networking!
That’s a question Tom Quinn must answer in the next 90 days. He has been offered millions of dollars for controlling interest in AVAILABLE.COM by a man who specializes in exploiting women.
Quinn does not allow pornography on his website and works hard to monitor his on-line employment agency and dating service to make sure there is no nudity or fowl language. All resumes, job solicitations and ads for roommates, travel companions and models are listed under the PEOPLE category and are scrutinized regularly for inappropriate content.
“Occasionally someone will spend $20 to upload a personal ad with a short video clip and a few nude photos, but rarely does anyone ever misuse our services. If they do, we send the violator a nicely worded email explaining our policy and a suggestion that even the most beautiful body looks better in a swimsuit than a birthday suit.
We’re not prudes here at AVAILABLE.COM but nudity and pornography are simply not compatible with selling real estate and outdoor advertising."
Tom Quinn has been in the billboard business for over thirty years and recognizes the value of creative, well-placed media. That’s why AVAILABLE.COM signs are on everything from high-rise hotels to limousines, and on some very pretty girls. He even touts the merit of using AVAILABLE.COM clothing and bumper stickers to help people find a job, a date or to promote a business.
"If you wear one of our shirts or ball caps, put an AVAILABLE.COM decal on your car and post an ad on our website, you will get a response! The same goes for a real estate agent, a plumber, welder, webmaster or a working girl.
That’s why the Porno Pusher from Vegas wants to buy my company. He knows that advertising is expensive and that one pretty girl walking the streets wearing an AVAILABLE.COM halter-top will generate more business than a full-page ad in a Las Vegas Tabloid. Multiply that by a thousand hookers and you’ve got millions of very SATISFIED customers!
So, what will it be? Will you sell out to the pimp or take on other investors?
We're talking about a lot of money but nothing compared to what this company is really worth. While I appreciate the offer and recognize the potential of an On-line Escort Service, I think we’ll maintain our integrity and wait for a more suitable financial partner.
Tom Quinn can be reached at 918-742-SELL or by email at email@example.com.
"Available.com is a rising star with unlimited potential. If you need money, take on smaller investors that share your vision and are willing to work to make their investment payoff. Never go public, maintain your integrity and do not sell controlling interest in YOUR company." Henry Soloman
“There is still room for new internet leaders to be created. Of the five biggest internet companies 10 years from now, I can imagine that two or three of the existing leaders will stay on, but that two will be companies that haven’t even been born yet. The internet is an incredibly dynamic environment. You have to respond really fast.” Meg Whittman - CEO eBay.
"I'm Available - Send me a shirt!" Jude Law
"We're all prostitutes. Our price and what we do for the money is the only difference." Larry Flynt
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